"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." PROVERBS 3:5-6

"They have lost connection with the head, from whom the whole body, supported and held together by its ligaments and sinews, grows as God causes it to grow."

- COLOSSIANS 2:19 -

  I have often questioned the choices I have made in life. It’s fair to say that many have been noble. But at the same time, many have also been equally foolish. And as a result of these latter kind, they have inevitably brought great misery, and intense personal shame. It has taken me the labour of many years to finally unravel "the unnamed and faceless unction" governing many of my "best and worst choices". It is only in recent years that I have eventually come to see that behind both kinds of choices, there is a "primary root", a main wellspring, from which there has occasioned many springs, some that at times were arctic pure, and some at other times, unfortunately muddy.

This "root", I have discovered, is the deep-seated, God-scripted nature and visceral desire to "want to connect". Ironically, whilst on occasion I have been seen to be maybe a little "disconnected" as a person, the truth is that despite every outward appearance, there has always been a deep and unrelenting desire "to connect" in a real, and genuine, and pure way, and through that connection, to finally "belong", to be "fully accepted", and with that, to ultimately be LOVED. Along this journey, though, through the wisdom that God the Father has been urging me to apprehend, I have come to realise that it is upon the defining anvil of "HOW we respond" to that need, and to “WHERE we turn" in trying to satisfy that longing, that we ultimately make either our best or our worst decisions.

In the dark night of personal need, the “need to connect” has sometimes caused me my deepest angst. Sometimes, this angst has been through the soul acid of “personal rejection", on one hand. On the other hand, the angst has been the intense regret and remorse that has followed the error of seeking to satisfy what is a "legitimate need" through, ultimately, what is an "illegitimate means". It has been those moments that have caused me my deepest regret and shame. But sometimes the humbling “marinade of shame” has been known to produce the best fertilizer for genuine growth.

Nonetheless, for me and for all of us, our God is a God who teaches us through our errors and our shame. Furthermore, He is a beautiful Father who says that whilst we may be "guilty", we are most definitely "not condemned". And we know this to be so because, “For if you are led by the Spirit, you are NOT under the law.”(Galatians 5:18). And if we are not under the law (by virtue of the fact that we are led by the Spirit), then if we are led by the Spirit, we are also then His sons and daughters (Romans 8:14). Which means that God is not only always “God”, but God is also “Father” to those who are led by the Spirit. Therefore, as Father, it is His paternal prerogative to declare for those who are His sons and daughters, that “Therefore, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1).

Whilst “the law” condemns, “Fatherly love” does not. Fatherly love acknowledges wrong doing, and declares a son or daughter guilty. But instead of condemning, it reproves and corrects. “My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as a son.” (Hebrews 12:5-6). Instead of condemning, it counsels. "Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God." (Romans 6:13). For despite all our errors as sons and daughters, as for our own parents, and for those of our own children, only the genuine love of a Father can extend the profoundly magnanimous offer that is forgiveness. "For as by one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so also by one Man’s obedience many will be made righteous. Moreover the law entered that the offense might abound. But where sin abounded, grace abounded much more, so that as sin reigned in death, even so grace might reign through righteousness to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." (Romans 5:18-20). So whilst “the law” may condemn, for the law is easily offended, for there is no love in the law, “love”, by comparison, does not condemn. For by contrast, the “grace” of love abounds much more than does its “offense”. And the reason grace always abounds more than sin is because where there is love, there is connection. Where there is only law, there is no connection.

And now, as I have come to understand that it is the "connection motive" has powerfully shaped most of the seasons and tides of my life, I have also come to the deep knowledge that at its very epicentre, that the very “HEARTBEAT" of connection is actually the inner voice that drives us all to THE most rewarding and richest connection available to the heart and soul of man, which is CONNECTING WITH GOD, both as "God Almighty", and as "God the Father"! For whilst we are all drawn to connection, and whilst connection is that deep, visceral summons that urges us all to a place of wholeness, where we can finally find fullness of peace and joy, and a complete communion of heart and soul, that despite how meaningful connection can be when we genuinely connect with man, connection is only "fully experienced" or "wholly accomplished" when man lives and walks in a genuine connection with God.

What this also proves is that only when we truly connect with God, can we then truly connect with man too. And that, ultimately, all things point the heart of man to the heart of the Father who made us. And that in precisely the same way, that He too, has this deep desire for "relationship" and "connection" with each of us personally in turn. For He IS, after all, our Father. "You have called me to Yourself" (Romans 8:28). And that in THISconnection, we can never make a mistake. In this connection, we do not stumble or fall. In this connection, we do not express a legitimate need illegitimately. There is only LIFE and LIBERTY and LOVE in this connection, and LICENSE to enjoy LONGEVITY framed in the embrace of eternity. And for all of man, “the cross hairs” that zero man’s sights on this particular connection, are none other than the cross hairs of the “living icon of the Cross”. “I will satisfy the weary soul, and every languishing soul I will replenish.” (Jeremiah 31:25).

If you think that the need for connection is not "a universal longing", all one needs to do is look at how Mark Zuckerberg has become the sixth richest person in the world, having a personal wealth of $51.7 billion (at the time of writing). But more so than that, at age 31, Zuckerberg is the youngest of the world's ten richest people, having amassed his personal wealth through none other than developing an application designed "specifically for human connection". Facebook.

As a child, I grew up in the construct of a family unit that sadly “didn’t know how to truly connect”. Because of this, it eventually progressed to a family unit where what little connection there was, it one day "failed completely”. The real failure was that, somehow, we had never managed to learn HOW to truly connect. Growing up as a young boy, as a short-lived substitute, I found a measure of connection in movies. Movies were a great learning ground for me, both emotionally and in terms of relationship. I think I came from the last generation to ever be treated to the vintage genre of the "Cowboys and Indians" movies. I was always drawn with such a strong gravity to an allegiance with the Native Americans. It was always with the Native Americans that I connected with. Even years later, one of my all time favourites is "The Last of the Mohicans". I was particularly drawn to the relationship between Uncas (Eric Schweig) and his father Chingachgook (Russell Means), and his adopted half-white brother Hawkeye (Daniel Day-Lewis). Their unbreakable bond of union and unity, of strength and love, moves my heart and soul still to this day. How I have yearned for something like that.

One thing I could never understand, though, was why Native Americans were always portrayed as "the villains"in movies. And don't get me even started on what I think and feel of what western civilization has done to their culture and civilization. For me, they spoke of everything I desired, and everything I admired. For there was a genuine brotherhood and family. There was no greed. They respected the land, and both fauna and flora. They lived in simple yet fully appropriate dwellings that didn't supersede their needs. They had life skills. They knew how to eat off the land. They road their horses without saddles, showing how they understood each other, and were as one. They shared what I imagine to be an Adam-kind of relationship with creation.

All members of the community had clear roles and duties, and fulfilled them all willingly in the interests of their community. They showed social responsibility. They looked after both their young, and their old, and widows and orphans, and for a long time, kept themselves unspotted by the world. "Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world."(James 1:27). They hunted for community, not just for self, and never for more than what they ever needed. There was no waste. Life was respected, as was death. They married once, and for life. They defended their own with their own life, and were happy to lay down their own life for another (John 15:3). And importantly to me still, is they were warriors (Zephaphania 3:17). They were “brave”. For God says in Revelation 21:8 that the “cowardly” will not see the kingdom of heaven. In other words, those who do not stand up for love, those who do not stand up for the truth, those who do not stand up for what is right and wrong and good and evil, these are they who he regards as cowardly. They are those who choose not to live by the way and the truth and the life that all coalesce into love.

As a boy, I used to dream of being integrated into their ways and their community. What I can see now is that what was behind the deep pull at my heart and soul towards them was "the connection of their community". At the heart of “smoking the peace pipe with another” was the astonishing regard for the intimacy of connection that as a child I had never personally seen or experienced to that degree before, which was that the air that they inhaled and then exhaled was the very same air that their “peace pipe brother” would then also inhale and exhale, so that by sharing the “breath of life together”, they would then “be as one”. As a boy, no matter how much I wanted the same thing they had as a community with each of my brothers, and my mum and dad, to feel unmistakably whole and connected, it somehow seemed to elude us. “Let the PEACE of Christ RULE in your hearts, since as members of ONE BODY, you were CALLED to peace.” (1 Colossians 3:15).

It was the same “fellowship of community” that they portrayed when hunting for food. The words and gestures of love and respect they would subsequently tenderly speak over that fallen animal, in a deep show of remorse and regret, was that they had together both breathed in their lungs the same air, and as such were brothers. I still have this ache in my heart for the love and brotherhood of a community like theirs, and for their noble ways, and for the honesty of their life. For at the heart of the beauty that was “their community” was that they lived and walked with a measure of “real loving connection”.

Later on in life, when I first began work, I met a Jewish man. He hired me . And he became my first boss. And once more I found myself drawn to the community that still is the strong Jewish solidarity through community. I silently observed their ways and their customs. I felt an unspoken affinity. I wanted to go and spend some extended time on a kibbutz and see where life took me from there. I started going to synagogue. I loved their food. I saw strong parallels between my childhood birthed love for Native Americans and the way Jewish families integrate as a community. The Jewish culture is also one of brotherhood, and of looking after each other. Just like the Native American people, the men and woman of Israel are also warriors. And they defend their land to their own death if necessary, and all for the gain “of community”. At the time, I imagined I would one day marry a Jewish woman. I was on the verge of converting to Judaism when the family I had grown so fond of, to trust, was sadly and suddenly torn apart by personal crisis.

If we take a look at what has fallen on man since the Fall, man needs to now toil in order to sustain his family (Genesis 3:17). For those of us who have not yet fully restored the umbilical with Father, having our needs met is no longer an assured provision. But, in that design, there is also a potential blessing. God forces the establishment "of community" through the construct that is daily work. It forces man to rub shoulders with others, and strangers, and neighbours every day. It creates a platform for pursuing agape love, and for creating a community under the Fatherhood of the One who designed brotherhood, and who defines love and relationship and connection and community. Corporate life has largely fallen way short of the glory of what should be what company life is today. Both individually and corporately, corporate life is, on the whole, intensely selfish. As an individual, people tend to seek employment today for what they can get, not what they can give. Corporate's seek to employ only for what they, in turn, can get, and not for what they can give. They always manage down what they ultimately reluctantly give, always looking for ways to minimise what they ever have to give. There is no "neighbour" in corporate anymore. It is all "Me, Myself, and I".

Having said that, some cultures today are more inclined to community than others. In that sense, they approximate God's second calling better than others. Many western civilisations are, in effect, more degenerate than others in that they have fallen well short of the glory that is the true love of community. They don't look after their young. and especially orphans. And they neglect the elderly, and especially widows. God created marriage so that man would get an intimate knowledge and appreciation for the value of community, and of the joy and fellowship that is pouring out your love tank for the benefit and gain of family and community.

It's no coincidence that the two greatest commandments speak to the primary and peremptory calling to “COMMUNION with the Father” and then, secondly, to the calling to “COMMUNITY with man”. Both communion and community have the same root. And this calling is typecast in the "model of life" and the example of living that is emblematic of “the Cross”. We FIRST "fill our love tank" INTERNALLY through communion with the Father, represented by the vertical stem of the Cross. And then we "pour out our love tank" EXTERNALLY through community with man, represented by the horizontal beam of the Cross.

If anyone ever wanted a better reason for why the Father of family insists "on church", it's because church insists "on community". It forces man beyond the insular, "me-myself-and-I" tendencies of the way of “the world” into a magnanimous way of family that crosses (the Cross at work again) all traditional boundaries, language barriers, economic distinctions and educational disparities. “The Latin term communitatus from which the English word "community" comes, is comprised of three elements, "Com" - a Latin prefix meaning with or together, "Munis" - ultimately Proto-Indo-European in origin, it has been suggested that it means "the changes or exchanges that link" and "tatus" a Latin suffix suggesting diminutive, small, intimate or local”. God insists on church as small groups that come together in intimate exchange, because it encourages fellowship and community, and establishes the foundation for expressing and accomplishing the second cornerstone of love, which is to "love one's neighbour as oneself". (Matthew 22:37).

When God says, “I will satisfy the weary soul, and every languishing soul I will replenish” (Jeremiah 31:25), God does this in two ways: first through filling our love tank through relationship with Him “as Father” and "as God" being from whence we inherit our identity and our ultimate sense of belonging, and then through pouring out our love tank through community with man. And in this lifestyle dynamic that is symbolised by the living icon that is the Cross, and that is fulfilled by the LOVE TANK that is unlocked by the Cross, we come to know and apprehend the deep love that is "the way, and the truth, and the life." (John 14:6). May we find our truest and deepest connection in YOU, Father! May our hearts be established in an uninterrupted and continuous abiding in the knowledge, and the understanding, and the wisdom, and the everlasting way and truth and life, of genuinely connecting with You, and in remaining connected to You, for now and for always. Amen and amen.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."
(Proverbs 3:5-6)

“Those who leave everything in God’s hands
will eventually see God’s hands in everything.”
UNKNOWN

- To God be all the glory. Forever and ever. Amen and amen.

- God's richest blessings, Wayne Biehn